Unmoored

You know that moment when your life changes? You feel a click or a tingle, like you’re headed in the right direction. This moment has only happened a few times in my life. Including the moment I found out I would be a mom and when I discovered my love for mathematics. Lately, a lot of things have clicked. I feel as though I am exactly where I am meant to be… even if it is this lost jungle that is my mid-twenties. This is the first time I have felt lost and at home simultaneously.

At this time in my life, I feel like I should have a plan. I feel like I should be more together, know where I am going, have more clear goals… However, all I can feel is that I am unmoored. I am veering away from my type A personality a little at a time, and it is terrifying. I feel all of the loose ends of my life unraveling.

Dramatic, I know, right? Who knew that the daily prompt today would depict my feelings so well. By the way, to define the word:

Unmoor
[uhn-moo r]

verb (used with object)
1. to loose (a vessel) from moorings or anchorage.

2. to bring to the state of riding with a single anchor after being moored by two or more.

I have been anchored in my comfort zone for so long now. I have had the excuse of school and stress to not have to pay attention to my own well being. It is a strange feeling to know that now I need to take care of myself, and learn how to just be.

I need to embrace this terrifying, unmoored freedom with vigor. More than ever lately, I have been inspired. I think this is partially due to this new freedom I am feeling. I can picture myself happy with my life.

I am not there yet… but I can picture it. I can see a day where I am not rushing to do all of the things I need to do, and then napping because I am completely exhausted from the stress. I can imagine a world where I can handle anything that is thrown at me.

I am not ready to be as unmoored as I am, but I am learning to embrace the mess that is my life. I am still learning that it is perfectly okay to not be okay.

What are your thoughts on the Daily Prompt word? What makes you feel unmoored? Is it terrifying or freeing?

via Daily Prompt: Unmoored

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